Don’t be ashamed to cry

Especially for men, there is a taboo about crying. It shows weakness. It shows sadness, which we often associate with negative energy. We even tend to assume that it shows instability, and it sometimes makes us feel unstable to observe someone crying–thus the sudden urges to say “don’t cry” to someone who is crying.

We accept these messages that, except in very specific circumstances, there is something wrong when somebody is crying. Frequently, something is wrong. But very often, something is really right. And I’m not talking about tears of joy.

The human spirit needs to feel. We have emotions as part of life and living; none of them are wrong–they just are. When we “break down and cry,” we are feeling sadness. Crying is a wonderful, full expression of that.

Have you ever noticed that, as much effort as you may make not to cry, once you do cry, you feel so much better and more relaxed afterwards? Even if you have a lingering feeling of embarrassment or vulnerability, still–that embarrassment/vulnerability is so much easier to cope with because you have cried, releasing inner tensions and healing your spirit.

Positive energy is all about healing, and crying is an incredibly powerful healing tool. You know how sometimes you can get so tensed up and feel like you can’t unwind? Crying is the ultimate unwinding… letting go. That’s why sometimes you sob uncontrollably… you are giving up control.

I personally have a few songs and things I think about that are pretty much guaranteed to make me cry if I meditate on them. Every now and then I play these songs just to get back in touch with that sacred sadness that helps me heal and appreciate my spirituality. Usually the theme is something to do with innocence stolen away; Michael Jackson’s song “Childhood” and Adriano Celentano’s “Il Ragazzo della Via Gluck” (an Italian classic) are among the tear-jerkers on my mp3 player.

Whatever makes you cry… embrace it. It’s meaningful. Something about it is extremely important to you. It’s not meant to be fought; it’s meant to be embraced. Just as you would embrace a challenge to “keep it together” and push forward, so also should you embrace the challenge of facing your vulnerability and letting yourself fully feel it, learn from it, and reap the healing benefits it brings.