Positive self-talk: life is a film, not a photograph

You know how you feel something so strongly at certain points? Like “I will love this person for ever and ever,” or “I hate this person so much right now I could kill them…”

Ever notice how, as strong as these feelings are in the moment, they tend to change in intensity? Sometimes rather quickly…

This is because we as a society have developed strong concepts about the past and the future. But that doesn’t change the fact that we can only feel the present.

Even when we’re feeling what feels like the completely certain future, still–really this is our projection of such a future. And this projection of ours is happening in the present.

This is an important thing to remember when you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.

But it’s also important to remember when you are in the thick of the great, wonderful moments in your life. Because those moments change, too.

I’m not saying this to be a downer on things. I’m more saying it because remembering this–that feelings of the present are merely a snapshot of the ever-moving, ever-changing film of life–helps tremendously in keeping emotional stability.

You see, if you are madly in love with somebody you haven’t known a long time [or even somebody you have known a long time] and you truly think that “this feeling will last forever,” you are setting yourself up for tremendous disappointment later. Feelings of love don’t go away, but episodes of lovestruck passion always do.

There are good times, and bad times; neither lasts forever. So why rejoice? Because things are constantly changing, and if you have a positive outlook, you will realize that this means that life is full of awesome surprises that your mind can never predict–and that’s a good thing. Often, the best things in life are awesome precisely because we never saw them coming.

Part of getting that positive outlook involves developing a sense of internal peace and equilibrium about change. Change will happen–and that’s ok. There is no reason to resist it. You’ve gotten this far, so you will be able to weather the storms that come. Then, you can actually develop the power to change your psychology in the moment for the better.

So when things are bad, you can remind yourself that the way you feel now is ok, and it won’t stay the same. It will change, and you will have answers.

And when things are good, you can tune yourself to truly enjoy them, because you know that this present goodness will not last forever–so let go and let the joy in, now, because it is here now.

That’s not to say there won’t be more good times in the future–there will. But they won’t ever be just like the present. They’ll be fresh, and different. And that’s a good thing. An awesome thing.